Right; from the outset, we declare that this is not original; the photograph has been filched from Gotcha, where WhaleOil is running a similar caption contest.
But we're sure that you'll agree (well, most of you), that original or not, this picture is just too good NOT to use; you can't make stuff like this up.
Go on; give it your best shot. You know the rules; brief, pithy, humourous, and not personal. Oh, and Robert; stick to the subject mate!
The floor is yours ...