As we've mentioned more than once, we go back a few years, being a child of the 1950's. We well remember the 1971 British Lions tour to New Zealand where the Lions won the series here for the first and only time, and the team was accompanied by the most bitter and twisted pack of journalists ever assembled. One of those was Daily Telegraph writer John Reason, who had an especially stroong sense of distaste for rugby in the Antipodes.
When John Reason passed away a couple of years ago, DJ Cameron, a doyen of New Zealand sports journos wrote an obituary in the NZ Herald. It began thus:
New Zealanders may regard the selective and often critical tone that Stephen Jones takes in his Sunday Star-Times articles about New Zealand rugby in general and the All Blacks in particular as bilious and ill-aimed assaults on our beloved game.
They might take a more charitable view of the inimitable Welshman if they realised that this month came the death of John Reason, the Sunday Telegraph and Daily Telegraph rugby correspondent whose witheringly cynical blasts at New Zealand rugby in the 1960-80s make Jones' efforts appear as mere slaps on the wrist.
John Reason was survived by a son, Mark. And Mark Reason also became a rugby correspondent for the Daily Telegraph before migrating to New Zealand. But he's a chip off the old block, as his column on Stuff this morning suggests; check this out:
If New Zealand go out of a consecutive World Cup because of another dodgy refereeing decision, they will have no one to blame but themselves. The All Blacks no longer even bother to bend the laws. They set out to deliberately cheat. For only one piffling syllable, CHEAT is an awfully big word. "Who are you calling a cheat?" demands the card-playing gunslinger, just before the mandatory murder and the five aces sliding from the sleeve.
The All Blacks cheat in spades. Half of their tries in the Tri- Nations have been set up by blatant cheating.
Go back to the first South Africa game just before Wyatt Crockett scored in the corner. It is hard to believe that Richie McCaw could be four yards offside and get away with it, but there he is holding back the South African lock.
In the first game against Australia they are at it again. Piri Weepu set up the first try by going through a hole created by Ali Williams holding Quade Cooper to the ground.
In the buildup to the second try Ma'a Nonu sets a screen (much as they might do in basketball) for Kieran Read.
Every week Paddy O'Brien, the International Rugby Board head of referees, sends out a directive to the coaches about issues that have arisen from the weekend games. At this point O'Brien warned coaches about all the holding back and obstruction that was going on. He might as well have told the All Blacks to stop doing the haka for all the notice they took.
New Zealand were at it again on Saturday. There were just three incidents in the leadup to their first try, but the second try was exceptional. As Nonu was running through another black hole, a prone David Pocock was waving his arms in frustration. McCaw and Keven Mealamu had held him pinned to the ground for 14 seconds.
Even by the very high standards of the All Blacks, 14 seconds must have constituted a personal best. Does McCaw have an invisibility cloak that only television cameras can penetrate? Even Robbie Deans called him "a bloody menace" and that's when he was coach of the Crusaders.
This is an extraordinary piece by Reason the Younger, but it's also one of which his father would be immensely proud. But Mark Reason writes with a very jaundiced eye. He makes no mention of Quade Cooper's repeated attacks on McCaw since Hong Kong last year. He makes no mention of the fact that as Will Genia scored Australia's first try on Saturday night, Cooper was holding McCaw back, creating a gap through which Genia slipped. He makes no mention of Genia's skill at running close enough to referees that he cannot be tackled. He certainly makes no mention of Quade Cooper's knee to McCaw's face.
Sure; the All Blacks are not lilywhite. The reality is that NO team in international rugby is lilywhite. Rugby is a combatitive, contact sport. It is a contest of skills and tactics. And as happens in any sport, players will push referees to and beyond the limit of the law. That's probably not as it should be, but it is the reality. We know from our own officiating days that players, even in lower grades know what a particular referee's strengths or weakenesses are, and do their best to exploit them.
But to suggest that the All Blacks are the only international team that pushes the envelope (and does Reason Jr mention and other guilty team?) is patently absurd. This is nothing more than a beat-up.
So here's a trivia question or three: Who was the last All Black sent off in a test match? Who was the last English player? And the last Australian? We'll add the answers later if no-one gets them, but let's just say that it's been a lot longer between drinks for one of those three teams than the others.
Alongside the colum, Stuff is running a poll to which over 7000 people have replied. 18% of respondents think the All Blacks cheat, and 22% think they don't. But an overwhelming 4333 respondents (thus far), around 60% have chosen the obvious option; No more than any other side. That really says it all.
Back in the 1960's, Murray Ball wrote his first book; long before Footrot Flats made him a household name. Ball was a very good rugby player, and his first book, Fifteen Men on a Dead Man's Chest was a forefunner to his later literary successes. And it included this little ditty:
The Lions represent Great Britain, And in that team they have to fit in
English, Irish, Scots and Welsh, And press-men sent to make us belch
Indeed this party never fails, To include at least one man of wails
Guess who that man of wails is in 2011?